CatDonna's Cats

First, some little stories.

Lucie [it has been confirmed] has discovered a new storage space for her toy hedgehog: the water bowl.

He's drying off in the sun now. Sigh. How to tell Lucie that hedgehogs cannot swim?

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Good news! Pip has gone off her heat now, and the house is remarkably peaceful.

Unfortunately, now it's Chocolate's turn.

*counting down the days until I can afford to get them sterilised*

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Now onto the real story for today! For years, I'd turned up my nose at those selfish, shallow pet owners who force their poor companions into the humiliation of wearing pet clothing. How cruel, I used to pronounce pompously, I shall never debase the natural furred/feathered/scaled glory of my dear animal friends, I mean can't you see the subtle abuse?!

Then last week I went to my regular pet needs supplier at East Coast and she just happened to be displaying the cutest pet clothes ever. Just in time for the Chinese New Year you see.

And when I woke up from my retail frenzy I realised I now owned:

• One red satin brocade pet kimono
• One blue satin brocade pet cheongsam
• One khaki green Mickey Mouse cotton pet tank top
• One pink-and-white-striped cotton pet tank top that had little chickadees all over with speech balloons saying "beep"

Yes, it was one of those "WTH" moments in my life, up there with the time I ate a heaped tablespoon of wasabi on a dare or the time I dated a swimmer-model for two weeks just 'cos he was drop-dead gorgeous, even after it became painfully obvious that he was dropped on his head as a child... oh dang too much information shutupshutupshutUP.

Ahem. Photos!


Cheongsam Choc says Happy New Year


Boonie models the latest line of funky, slightly gay-looking Mickey Mouse tops


"Daddy, I don't like that woman with the camera"


No one has called the Ginger Samurai a eunuch to his face, and lived to tell the tale


Bitter ever since Mr. Gyllenhaal's lawyers served her the restraining order, Pip scorns all festivities

Then after the photoshoot, the cats cracked.

Minutes after posing in his little kimono, Teddy turned and ran for the hills. Terrified at this new satin cat's sudden movement, Lucie freaked; somehow she landed on my leg and scratched me quite badly. Meanwhile, Pip and Polly were chasing Teddy round the dining table. Doe was so excited he vomited on the floor. Choc was seducing the carpet too much to care and Boonie was crying for his top to be taken off.

Now you know why I cannot make it as a fashion photographer. I can't seem to keep my models happy.

CatDonna

After a brave struggle with illness, Cat's Fudge has finally passed on. In the midst of new year celebrations, let's pause to remember this very special little kitty and her precious foster.

RIP Fudge, and condolences to Cat from all of us at CatDonna's Cats.

Before we run off for our reunion dinner at the parents' place... just some little updates on the cats' latest activities:

Someone's a good little kitty, but we don't know who:


Someone's packing her toys away after play...



...but who's the good kitty then? Too many suspects!

Putting away the toys after play is a good practice, but perhaps it's time for some real storage space? :)

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Teddy was castrated yesterday. I think the hardest part for him was the pre-surgery fast:


I asked for "stuffed rabbit" and all I got was this stupid toy!

He really looked miserable for a while. After all, the boy lives to eat. He was crying all the way to the vet, but I suspect it wasn't so much out of fear than hunger.


Teddy: a young ginger cat of, umm, generous proportions [Note: he actually looks quite slim in this picture. Teddy usually looks chubbier]

Anyway, it all went smoothly; the vets and nurses were praising him for his sweetness and docility. I do hope Doe will stop beating him up so much after this.

Will update some more, later. Hoping to get some good shots of the cats in their CNY clothing. In case I don't make it back here in time, a happy Chinese New Year! Take your dog[s] for a walk if you have any. :D

Pip wants to do the last bit of news so here she is.

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I am on heat for the first time! RRROOAAAAARRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hahahaha! I love it! I've always wanted to scream the house down and now, finally, my obnoxious behaviour is hormonally justified! Not that I ever cared, but yaaaay!!!

The woman is walking around muttering darkly about "the cost of neutering that irritating yowling brat". She is right, Teddy is a pain in the butt although I'm not so sure about the yowling bit... he's just quietly stupid if you know what I mean.

Anyway, I'm ON HEAT and I'm LOOKING FOR A BOYFRIEND, so DEAL WITH IT SUCKERS!!!!!! None of the males here interest me in the least, after all I AM SUPERIOR to them, but I'm strangely attracted to the Woman's trousers, and WHERE IS JAKE GYLLENHAAL WHEN YOU NEED TO MAKE HOT SWEET LOVE.



YYYOOOOOWWWRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


PIP "POPOZAO" PRINCESS

Black cats are uniquely charismatic. Sleek, smart and suave, they inspire admiration, awe and sometimes even superstitious fear. Yeah they're cool.

So you must check this out, dear readers, yes all 1.5 of you. Well, actually Gucci's got a little white spot on his chest but never mind, he rocks.

For Daryl, if you're reading this. ;)

CatDonna

++Edit++ Umm sorry. 5-Cat Style, ex-foster of Gucci, informs me that Gucci's all black. Yes yes. So check out the pics and this time, feel free to snigger at me. Heh! *sheepish* ;)

The woman is in a very bad mood today. Apparently there have been some very nasty things happening at work.

It is therefore my privilege... yet again, as the better writer... to produce a post worthy of my erudite brilliance. Look upon my works, ye mighty, and despair.

Nah, I think I'll just sit around and clean my butt instead. In a minute.

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It's times like these, when the woman is all annoyed with stuff like work, her weight, her cats [but not the I, never! the I], that the best thing to do is to remember the good.

Remember the friends.



Remember the love.



Remember the air, the sunshine, the warmth, the life.





Most of all, be still and remember that this moment of frustration is only a moment; it rushes past, then fades away; there is something greater, far greater than all this, only just be still;



Be still. The mad rush, the voices in your head, the muttering convulsing insanities of this world.

Peace, be still. And listen, listen carefully... for the One simultaneously Out There in the greater universe and also in you, is Himself listening to the softest murmurs of your heart.

I've always believed this: in times of trouble, to listen. Carefully. Because somewhere in the midst of tinkling star and whispering heart, you can hear Him laughing.

And His joy will give you strength.

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Dang, I am good.

Pip

Not the cats, fortunately. Only me [or as Pip would say, only the I]. It turns out the previous mornings of waking up breathless and nauseated were caused by a severe sinus reaction to a slight bout of flu earlier in the week; and not, as I'd thought, simply in my imagination.

So here I sit at the computer with Pip asleep on my lap. She barely stirs, even when I shift my butt, stretch my legs or laugh out loud at downloaded episodes of South Park. If only my afternoons could always be this blissfully relaxed... ah, the wonders of medical leave.


Eh, what?

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The potential adopters came yesterday for prospective-kitten-viewing. I'm glad they seemed to like Lucie and Boonie. The kittens were their usual playful selves and charmed us all [not surprisingly].

What did surprise me though, was Chocolate's inexplicable behaviour. For the first time, she came out of the kitchen to greet the visitors, and even sat on one of their laps voluntarily. I've kept her for almost six months and she'd never done that before, certainly not with me. Although I've noticed her cuddling up to the husband while he was working. Hmmm. Quite possibly, the lady is a tramp.


Traaaaamp!!!!!!!!!

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We loaded a wash and I think there are jeans involved this time. The metal buttons went clink clank quite loudly as the washing machine started.

Boonie panicked and ran squealing aaiiieeeeeeeeee!!!!!!! into the study, and had to be picked up and comforted.

Lucie remained placid throughout. But I think I caught a contemptuous glint in her deep, golden eyes. Ha, stupid brother.

His adopters are going to have so much fun.


The silly one...


... And his sister the calm one


CatDonna

I learn something new about cats everyday. These little events happened over the past couple of weeks. Right, let's get started:

1. Roach Hunt
I'm in the bedroom reading and I hear this loud, ominous "crash/thud" sound, the kind you don't need to hear when you're about to rest.

I come out to the living room and I see this: the five big kittens and two babies on the dining table, staring expectantly towards the ceiling. [The crash/thud was a fallen dining chair... prolly one of the cats pushed it a bit too hard while jumping up the table.]

Then a little bug head peeps out from behind one of the ceiling lamps, desperately looking around for a place, any place to hide. It's a cockroach, and a big three-incher.

All my life I'd never seen a frightened cockroach. Till now.

You can see the fear in its beady little eyes; for a moment I actually feel sorry for it. Then it flies for the wall -- a flash of black and orange fur -- and everything's over.

The winner is Polly, whose ferocious bloodlust and soaring leap leaves the rest eating her dust. She then plays with her roach very slowly, pulling off legs and gently batting the body into pieces so the roach stays alive to the end.

Even after we clear the mess and turn in for the night, Teddy is still on the dining table in quiet confusion, looking up at the ceiling and meowing quizzically.

2. Royal Flush
I'm sitting on the toilet. Yes, don't laugh, you poo too. Pip comes in for a bit. She likes to hang around when I'm showering, and she's guessing it's not far off.

So I let her sit on the cistern behind me. A minute later, the toilet flushes, apparently by itself. My butt is cold and wet. I turn to yell at Pip, and I see this: a paw on the flush button, a pair of green eyes widening at the significance of this new skill, and a criminally poker face.

And then Pip flushes the toilet again. With me still on it, and shrieking. I couldn't get up because I hadn't wiped yet, ok?

3. ...And they even tell you off
I've caught a cold and I'm sitting around feeling bleah. Then the sneezing attack starts and it's one of those loud and unstoppable, six-or-seven-at-a-shot snotty redfaced ones.

I thought I was alone in the room, so at first I wonder about the soft, high-pitched noise that follows each sneeze I make. Then I turn and Pip's lying on the table, evidently having just woken up from a nap. Her eys are half-closed and she's staring daggers at me.

The mystery is solved when I sneeze againandagain, and each time Pip moves her lips a bit and mutters peevishly, aiaiaiiiiiiiiiii.

This is Classic Pip: Patronising. Pissed off. Perfectly enunciated annoyance.

Just to test her I pretend to sneeze, pitting my feeble sense of humour against Her Imperial Haughtiness Pip the High-Priestess of Good Social Manners. In retaliation, Pip slowly blinks away -- she is offended at my presumption -- and ostensibly goes back to sleep. Now the stupid woman's shut up, the Princess can finally get some rest.


CatDonna

Lucie and Boonie are going for a short trial adoption at the end of this week. Hopefully the adopters' entire family will accept and grow to love 'em kitties, and there'll be a happy ending for all.

Lucie seemed to know this when I picked her up for a cuddle this evening. Normally she perches daintily on our shoulders, with a quiet look of resignation at her humans' sloppy and embarrassing displays of affection.

Tonight, she leaned against my shoulder with her full (albeit light) weight. Nuzzled her sweet small apple-shaped head against my neck. And began to smooch my face with delicate little licklicklicks.

A cat has got to be really into her human to do that, y'all.

Sometimes I'm convinced that even if animals can't speak, they know what we're trying to express. They sense the movements in our soul.

And I think for a moment, Lucie was reaching out to me in her own way, just to comfort, just to say We're almost there now, and thank you for wanting me to be happy.

Yeah. I hope everything works out too.

The Woman


ps/ Oh please dear God don't let Boonie meow the house down and annoy everyone when he's there. Some cats just can't. Stop. Talking.

Maybe if I act all cute we'll get adopters!



Okay let me think of how we can get adopted. Concentrate!...



Nothing beats old-fashioned looking high and low, I guess...


Whatever it is, don't give up...



But don't fall asleep either!!!!!!!


Love,
Lucie Luckystar & Boonie Blackbear

It's said that how humans sleep reflects their personalities: which are you?

On the back: Observant and reserved
On the stomach: Strong and dominating
On the side(s): Friendly and gregarious
Curled up: Vulnerable
Sprawled out: Confident
Rolling around a lot: On the floor

I'm kidding with the last one. As with all so-called "research" and other urban legends, I find such generalisations unfair overall, but not without their grains of truth.

Although I do seem to see a pattern in how the cats sleep and how they behave when they're awake, so let's see. The following observations are based mainly on the cats' attempts to join me in bed when I'm too tired to shake them off... they sure know where the good spots are...

Since he was a little bottle-sucking infant, Doe has always wriggled his way onto my pillow so he slept next to my neck. Now he's a large young cat and he's still sharing my pillow, except he takes about two-thirds of it while squashing liberal amounts of furry behind onto my face and purring loudly like an old coffee grinder. I think it's partly a snuggle instinct to get to the mother cat's warmest bits, and partly an alpha male declaration of superiority over the other kitties. He's egoistic like that. Men.

When Polly first came as a six-week-old orphan, she used to huddle into my hair while I slept; sometimes she even tried to burrow under me for protection. But after she settled in, her confidence grew and Polly's Bad Attitude emerged. For a while she rebelled, preferring to sleep on the dining chairs and swoop down on unsuspecting kittens that walked by; but now she's much better and curls up at our feet or sides.

Chocolate used to hide in strange places just to sleep; she was that badly bullied at first. But she's a gentle dear girl and now she joins the rest on our bed... except for one lovingly odd habit: she absolutely adores sleeping in between our legs. Which gave a bit of a jolt at first when I woke up and WHATTHEHELLAWAYFROM MEHEEELLLPP.

Teddy is clearly a submissive in the greater kitty order of things. He sleeps at the foot of the bed. He does have a quiet defiance to him, though. There have been times I caught him surreptitiously sleeping with his head on my pillow. That's baiting Doe for you.

Lucie and Boonie are too excited to sleep very much on the bed. They're three months old and at the hyperactive goon stage, so they generally romp around and wake me up. Will be posting more pics of them soon; they're still up for adoption!

PIP SLEEPS ON TOP OF ME. 'NUFF SAID.

CatDonna aka The Woman

FINALLY.........

We have reached the apex of this most beauteous bountiful blog.

First, a teaser: baby pics of Doe, my beefy obnoxious big brother, and the I.

Me already yelling at my brother from a tender age. Clearly some of us are BORN TO RULE.

The woman found us last year tied up in a plastic bag at the bottom of an apartment block, two weeks old with severe cat flu and abandoned to die. The vet said we only had a 50-50 chance of survival and even if we made it, chances were high we would be blind from the bad eye infections we had. PAH!!! Obviously these humans don't know how resilient I, the Pipperina Princess (and my stupid brother JamCreamDoeNut) can be!!!!!



The woman didn't sleep for about six weeks

We made it, alive and without visual impairment, and I am beautiful!!!!!!!!!!!!! Many people love Doe because he's so friendly and outgoing but the REAL MIRACLE IS THE MOI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Observe! How that Beefy Boofy Brother of Mine is now Big and Beefy and, er... Boofy!

Doe's favourite game: Stalking invisible prey

And I have grown into the beautifullest Prrrrincess in all the land! Gaze upon the splendour of my most beauteous Princess Pose!

People who call me a weird obsessive stuck up moggy with a funny tail are smelly and inferior, and should just go to a corner and DIE!

And most especially graceful is THE WAY I SIT!!!!!!!!!! ON MY BED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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You're welcome.

Pip "Simply The Best"

There was confetti and free-flowing drinks from the punch bowl

I hope you had a grand new year! 2006 will be even better, I can feel it in my whiskers.

Introducing Chocolate:














Choc (left) with Polly (right): isn't she beautiful.
Full chocolate tabby markings in an uncommon shade of red-brown (unfortunately not very clear here).

The woman found Chocolate as a 3-month-old in a dingy old coffeeshop begging for scraps of curried chicken. Chocs was skinny as heck but the woman, being the superficial person with low standards that she is, thought Chocs had the potential to be taken off the streets and adopted.

Fast forward two weeks and the woman decides to keep this new kitten herself. That quiet, stuck up little tabby with a frame so thin I could crush it with a sneeze?!?!? WE WERE SO MAD!!!!!!! WE WEREN'T CONSULTED!!!!!!!! So we made things difficult for the newbie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Yet another escape attempt foiled by interfering little tortoiseshell

But over time we grew tired of this game. Bullying the quiet one wasn't so fun because all she did was flee or surrender with stoic grace, then the humans would run over and cuddle stupid Choc; in the end we moved on to fatty Teddy who is so wonderfully soft and slow and stupid and screaming. Heh heh!

Soooooooo at the end of this long storytelling session I want all of you to know that I HATE CHOC because Choc is irritating Choc is quiet and gentle and sucks up "affectionately" to the stupid humans they say I HATE CHOC Choc is called Choc because of her uncommon full red-brown tabby markings Choc is stuck up and annoying I HATE CHOC you can't bully her because her sense of humour was surgically removed at birth and she doesn't scream like Teddy I HATE CHOC because now she's not skinny anymore she is bigger than me and in my moments of insecurity i realise she is outstandingly beautiful with a perfect long tail and i don't have that and i am irrational paranoid and jealous I HATE I HATE HATE HATE CHOC.

Otherwise she's ok.

Pip