Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Dilemma.



"JACK. He is 2 months old and has recovered from an eye operation. A very jovial & friendly kitten who is a joy to look at. He is looking [for a] cats [sic] lover who is willing to overlook his eye condition (he is perfectly healthy) and can give him a family and provide love & care."

Got this off the Cat Welfare Society adoption board.

I quite like Jack. I dunno why. He strikes me as a rakishly cute little fellow, somewhat like Polly. [Polly, by the way, is my only adopted cat - the rest are rescues - and I got her off the CWS adoption board, too.]

But I know, I absolutely CANNOT take in yet another cat. Eight in one flat is more than enough for me and the husband. They're not cheap, either.

There will be a major cat show + adoption drive on 4 September [Sun] at the Singapore Expo. Hazel will be there, and he will probably be adopted.

I've decided not to bring Boonie and Lucie along, though, even though they've been up for adoption much longer. It's too traumatic for them.

I think Boonie almost collapsed from the stress, the last time they were at an adoption drive. It was embarrassing [imagine being asked "Why is that cat hyperventilating?" X 10,000 for six hours] and frankly, quite frightening to watch Boonie pant and cry nonstop.

I know it's a bad move not to bring 'em, though.
Chances of adoption if cats stay at home: pretty dang low.
Crap. I'm stuck.
But I can't bring myself to do it this time.

The next time we get such a large event will be next year. Boonie and Lucie will be over 1 year old by then, and that's the threshold beyond which adoption eligibility dwindles quite rapidly.

Everyone wants kittens.

If what I suspect comes to pass, Boonie and Lucie will be here for a while until the Right Person comes along, and that means my personal cat rescue resources [space, money, time, effort] will be severely constrained.

That means no adopting Jack, which I don't really mind. But it also does mean definitely no taking in more rescues unless they're life-and-death emergencies, and FORTHELOVEOFGOD, there are too many emergencies already.

As long as there are selfish and irresponsible humans, there will always be abandoned and abused cats/kittens.
What do I do, the next time I come across a box of abandoned kittens? The next time I discover a cat, abused and too injured to survive on the streets without human intervention?

Must the day come when I turn and walk away because I simply can't take on any more?

**********

Not that it hasn't happened before.

**********

So. Lucie and Boonie. Lovely young cats, healthy and affectionate. Best adopted together. If you want more details contact me. Any takers?

Monday, August 21, 2006

Just The Eight of Us [Lotsa Pics Ahead]

Guess what! We won a contest! Pip was the 10,000th reader of the well-known and well-loved blog belonging to Bonnie Underfoot and Victor Tabbycat.

Thank you for the kind gesture, lambj! And congratulations to Bonnie [drat, I keep spelling Boonie] and Victor on the enduring popularity of your lovely blog! Here's to many, many more readers to come.

Today was an exciting day. After I returned from this morning's Bingo and Scone Baking Club meeting I took out my crocheting kit andARGH GET OFF ME HEELLLLLLLLLPPPPPPP nvfjsopityhr564782orbdjklg;rw[gffnsuifrhajfklghu;i

**********

Got rid of the woman at last.

I, NOT "WE", won a cool contest held by a couple of even cooler cats. And I just want you darlings to know, Bonnie and Victor, that you don't have to prepare too many treatsies for us.

Herrrrrrre's my guide on Purchasing Treatsies for Just The Eight of Us CatDonna's Cats [yesss, there are eight of us at present]:

BOONIE BLACKBEAR

Mad black tabby boy with a penchant for hiding in paper bags. Large as an ox, eats like a horse, cries like a pussy when bullied. Don't waste your money on him.

Boonie is the brother of
LUCIE LUCKYSTAR

Violent vicious tortoiseshell tabby girl. Likes to attack stuffed toys and the woman's feet. She picks on Hazel too so I hate her. AND SHE AIN'T YOUR 10,000TH READER, OH NO!!! So you can leave her outta the treats.

By the way, Boonie and Lucie are up for adoption, so if there is anyone willing to help me get rid of my two worst enemies I will be very grateful. Thankee.

Moving on...

CHOCOLATE TIGRESS

A very unique dilute chocolate tabby girl, with perfect stripes and a long straight tail. She's beautiful and she knows it. Pretentious stuck-up poseur who loves the lap of luxury, and the woman's bed.

The truth about Choc is...

She's a zombie alien with ambitions to take over the world.

Ooh look, an unflattering pic of our pretty girl! Whatcha gonna do Choc, eye-laser me to death?! I'm so scared!! TOUGH POOPS GIRLIE, I'M WRITING THIS BLOG NOT YOU NYAH NYAH NYAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

Don't feed the zombies.

TEDDY

This is Teddy. Half-Persian bobtailed classic ginger tabby and white, male.

If there ever were a competition for World's Stupidest Cat, Teddy would at least be a very strong contender.

Ever heard of a cat who ran into walls when excited? Who would simply curl into a ball and wail when beaten up by the other cats? Whose sole purpose in life seems to be EAT then SLEEP then EAT then SLEEP... and hopefully without screwing up the order of events???

I'm sure there's a law around here that prohibits giving treats to fat and stupid cats UNDER PAIN OF DEATH AND OTHER GREAT SUFFERINGS.
If I were you, I'd abide by the law.


"Sigh... Pip's making fun of me again"


Although I'll admit he's cute as a button and easily the nicest, sweetest cat in our household.
How on earth did Teddy become the father of my lovely kittens?
I swear. I only let him knock me up out of pity.
[That, and the samurai costume.]

POLLY POCKET


Ugly dirty-looking tortoiseshell midget with disturbingly violent tendencies.


Polly is a foul-mouthed, aggressive little ball of fur, teeth and claws.
I will NEVER forgive her for the times she beat me to the first bite of stinky goodness or table scraps. Or the times she screamed and smacked my face JUST BECAUSE I bit her.
Ignore her pathetic attempts at acting cute.
Plus, she's undergoing treatment for congenital liver weakness, so that disqualifies her from treatsies, no?

DOE

has an eating disorder. We think he's bulimic but he's denying everything.
Still, it's strange how often he purges after eating.
The vet says Doe is fine, and some cats just tend to vomit more.
I say if your treatsies are gonna end up hurled onto the floor, save 'em.



Doe is the brother of
PIPPERINA PRINCESS!!!

The MOST DESERVING of YER LOVELY TREATSIES!
LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME!


Sexy: Watch out Paris Hilton!


In control: Bossing the woman around in the shower!


Just Gosh Darn Cute: FEED KITTEN PIP TREATS TREATS TREATS GIVE NOW I WANT.

Besides myself, the only other kitten deserving treats is the fruit of my lithe and nubile loins,
HAZEL [the NUT]

He's almost 5 months old already!


That's my boy! Give 'em the old dirty look!

Hazel deserves all the treats he gets. By association with the moi and my superior genes, of course.

So we don't ask for much, really - just one truckload of treats and toys for me, and another truckload for my Hazel baby.
The others can eat their little hearts out.
Heh heh heh!

Off I go for another beauty nap.

Thank you,
Pip

Friday, August 18, 2006

Skip to the loo, my darling



This reminds me of the time Pip learnt to flush the toilet, too. The only difference being that she flushed the loo when I was still on it. Oh, the memories.

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

The Woman Is Useless At Updating So Here I Am

Hello my darlings, this is Pip from a very long time ago. I'm sorry you haven't heard from me for so long, and it's been all up to the woman's feeble paws and dull intellect to type something out once in a while, which as I notice she HASN'T been doing lately... so let's get to it shall we?

I mean, all this nonsense about "looking out for the right job opportunities" and "part-time private tuition"... ppffftt.

PRIORITIES, where are your PRIORITIES, WOMAN?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!!

Anyway I'm back, after giving birth to one lovely bouncing boy kitten called Hazel and one wriggly shrivelled runty thing that the woman insisted on saving... still, he was a dear in the end. Whatever his name was.


Stop glaring Polly, of course I know his name... Fever? Fibre?

That one's been adopted and now it's just darling Hazel and the I... I've lost all my post-pregnancy weight, I know you'll all hate me for saying this but I DON'T CARE, I actually do think I'm slimmer and sexier than before I had the pesky babies.


Family portrait. I was already slimmer than Teddy by then. Although to be honest, that's not difficult.

Kind of like Victoria Beckham, you know, how she looked like a Pekingese before her babies and like a praying mantis after. A glamorous skinny tanned toned praying mantis.

Oh I'm sure you'll be hearing from me more often from now on!


Hazel: Mummy, sometimes I'm sad. Why do the cats not like me?
Pip: Well Hazelmydarling, it's all very simple...


... They're jealous of your big pink nose, annoying quacky voice, and general bad attitude. All the more you should look down on them, those inferior kitties scurrying around...


... Even the humans; you look 'em in the eye! Don't hate us cos we're beautiful, it won't help your looks for sure!

Speaking of Hazel, my darling pride and joy, he's becoming quite a pain in the @$$ nowadays. Hazel is now slightly over four months old and he's almost as large as I am... he's been gaining weight recently and he looks rather hefty now.


Hazel's Giant Paw



Size-wise I think he's taking after his father, but PURRAISE THE LORD his personality is very like mine. Terrible! Even I can't stand him myself, sometimes.

Hazel still tries to suckle but these days when he tries, I give a few well-aimed kicks to his dear little head. The woman feels sorry for the boy but I've got to wean him, right? Try cat teeth and sandpaper tongue on your nipples, moron.


Hazel tries to go for the milk...


... and is knocked out cold by one of Pip's kicks

Unfortunately Hazel's also got a new nickname now. The people call him Ducky. Hazel hardly meows because that's the patronising sound we make to humans only, a kind of loud and slowly enunciated "Heyyyy youuuu... feed me/ clean the box/ outta my face/ etc".

Hazel, being aloof and stuck up, doesn't really like to deal with humans so much. He only really talks to me... and well, the nutty little love, he... quacks.

The woman is trying to get a videocam to record this embarrassing idiosyncracy for posterity. Quack quack quack.

Hey, don't look at me. It's likely the father's side of the family. Probably some very stupid, watered-down Persian gene.

Anyway, don't tell anyone I told you this, because DuckyoopsImeanHazel is up for adoption next month and the woman is concerned about his chances. He's cute as a button, but whoever would want such a wacky, quacky little thing?

The woman's here. I have to go. I'm supposed to be asleep. More beauty rest for the moi.
Ciao, beautifuls.



Pip

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