Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Ohhh PIP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Don't be cross, I'm only a sweet widdle kitty...
[damn your ass, woman!]


I'm going to rant about what an idiot Pip was on Saturday. God, it's days like these I wonder why the heck I didn't just put her up for adoption from the start.

I mean when SP herself, an experienced catsitter with over 300 cats under her charge, shook her head in fascinated horror and said "CatDonna, your Pip is kinda crazy" while twirling her finger round her temple in a significant manner, I should have known I've got a mix of Psycho and The Exorcist playing in my hands.

Instead, I just laughed and said "Yeah, she's got personality".
Personality, my foot.

Anyway, I dunno if the planets were in an especial alignment for obnoxious and stupid behaviour last weekend but Pip certainly outshone her past achievements that Saturday.

As you all know, my last weekend was no weekend at all as I was frantically marking examination essays in time for the Monday deadline. So while I was stressing out, Pip decided to help.

First she lounged about the desk glaring at me.


The librarian is in

Then she must have thought, Oh dirty looks are not enough for this woman.
So she hopped into the cardboard lid cum makeshift script box and chewed it out.


"You should be so grateful I'm helping you with the scripts"

Then she CHEWED AND MANGLED A SCRIPT, the stupid animal, and that was when I put the camera down and expelled her from my workroom.


Only three weeks old, and already Pip was planning the destruction of my workroom

Later...

A low-grade cabin fever was getting to me so I took my scripts and went to mark in the living room.

Pip thought it was a good idea to dive under the scripts and fling them up in the air - which she proceeded to do several times.

Then she fought with Lucie.

Then she fought with Polly.

Then she fought with Chocolate [you like that don't you, Bonnie].

Then she fought with Boonie and I HAD ENOUGH SO I GRABBED PIP AND SHOOK HER AND YELLED CUT IT OUT WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU MISERABLE FREAK WHY CAN'T YOU JUST SHUT UUUPPPPP!!!!!!!

All the cats ran away in fright, while Pip struggled in my grip and tried to bite my thumb. Finally I put her back down on the floor and she lay quietly next to me. Behaving, at last. She didn't even flinch when her arch-enemy Lucie came and lay beside her for a while.


About the only time Pip doesn't start trouble

After a bit I went to the bathroom to wash my hands, Pip followed as usual, and as she jumped up the glass wall of the shower cubicle I walked out of the bathroom.

Then I heard
the SHRIEEEK!!! of a Pip tumbling off the wall and
the BAM!!! of a Pip hitting the toilet bowl and
the CRASHHH!!! of a Pip landing on the detergent bottles on the floor and then

Pip shot out the bathroom at top speed, her lower lip bleeding slightly. Apart from that, no discernible injury. Thank goodness.

Pip was pretty subdued the rest of the day.


Till next time, sucker

CatDonna

Comments:
What a weekend, indeed!
How's Pip's lower lip and your thumb?
 
Oh dear. Tuxedos can be a handful. Pip does have very strong personality. But she did all those just because she loves you and wants your attention.
 
Pip going through PMS?
 
no that should be read as menopause. sorry.
 
auntie p: hi hi. We are both fine, thx for your concern. Pip's cut was minor and healed in a day or so. And I wasn't bitten actually, even though Pip tried very hard to.

sir sidney and emperor nero: Yes, it's back to lazy days now that the assignment is over. btw, I've just been to your blogs and you are very handsome kitties. :)

I always tell myself to update my blogroll... soon...

cat_aunty: Yep, I know Pip is just being manja in her own way. I don't understand her sudden violent rages though, when she attacks everyone in sight. Are tuxedos like this in general?

anon: Pip is spayed so it can't be pms, and she's too young for menopause... that is, if cats menopause? I wonder.
 
Oh, poor Pip! So lovely and misunderstood. You want CatDonna all to yurself, don't you. As fur the papers, yur just tryin to help. All those ofur cats were gifin you a hard time, right?

I can't BELIEVE she shook you an yelled at you! What sort of behavior is that toward a princess? Retaliation may be in order.
 
CatDonna, I completely understand about Pip's aggressive behavior getting to be TOO MUCH! Bonnie is like that sometimes, growling at me to DEMAND treats, hissing when I pet her head, and generally responding to all Victor's playful approaches with LOUD growling, hissing, spitting, and snarling. I've had 2 tuxies who were "manja" in a more traditional sense; sweet, loving furbabies. Some girl kitties are too territorial for our own good. Too bad Bonnie and Pip can't form a real support group and discuss their issues :-)
- Bonnie & Victor's Mom
 
Oh Bonnie!!!

*dramatic tears and sniffles*

Nobody loves me! Not even that ungrateful woman! I just made her another chocolate swiss roll again in my personal bakery, this nice corner of the Persian carpet, and what does she do? She THROWS IT AWAY!!! Even the stupid man came over and said, "Oh Pip! Dang you, Pip!"

The woman was reading the comments on this blog and I heard her muttering "I don't understand why Bonnie goads Pip to retaliate. Pip doesn't need to RETALIATE when she constantly INITIATES trouble and STARTS fights..."

How could the woman be so unappreciative of true greatness? It's good to initiate and start things, it shows I'm a natural leader and a born princess, right? Right?! I'm always right!!!
 
B & V's Mom, I empathise entirely. Was Bonnie always like this?

One thing I can say for Pip is at least she never pretended to be nice, even from day one. As a wriggly two-week-old kitten, only the length of my palm and half blind from severe cat flu, Pip would headbutt our hands away and bite our fingers with her toothless gums whenever it was time for medication. Once she shrieked so loud and long, the neighbours came over to ensure we weren't actually abusing a kitten.

Not sure about the support group idea for Pip, Bonnie would probably benefit but what Pip really needs is electric shock therapy and a well-starched straitjacket. :P
 
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