CatDonna's Cats

Don't be cross, I'm only a sweet widdle kitty...
[damn your ass, woman!]

I'm going to rant about what an idiot Pip was on Saturday. God, it's days like these I wonder why the heck I didn't just put her up for adoption from the start.

I mean when SP herself, an experienced catsitter with over 300 cats under her charge, shook her head in fascinated horror and said "CatDonna, your Pip is kinda crazy" while twirling her finger round her temple in a significant manner, I should have known I've got a mix of Psycho and The Exorcist playing in my hands.

Instead, I just laughed and said "Yeah, she's got personality".
Personality, my foot.

Anyway, I dunno if the planets were in an especial alignment for obnoxious and stupid behaviour last weekend but Pip certainly outshone her past achievements that Saturday.

As you all know, my last weekend was no weekend at all as I was frantically marking examination essays in time for the Monday deadline. So while I was stressing out, Pip decided to help.

First she lounged about the desk glaring at me.


The librarian is in

Then she must have thought, Oh dirty looks are not enough for this woman.
So she hopped into the cardboard lid cum makeshift script box and chewed it out.


"You should be so grateful I'm helping you with the scripts"

Then she CHEWED AND MANGLED A SCRIPT, the stupid animal, and that was when I put the camera down and expelled her from my workroom.


Only three weeks old, and already Pip was planning the destruction of my workroom

Later...

A low-grade cabin fever was getting to me so I took my scripts and went to mark in the living room.

Pip thought it was a good idea to dive under the scripts and fling them up in the air - which she proceeded to do several times.

Then she fought with Lucie.

Then she fought with Polly.

Then she fought with Chocolate [you like that don't you, Bonnie].

Then she fought with Boonie and I HAD ENOUGH SO I GRABBED PIP AND SHOOK HER AND YELLED CUT IT OUT WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU MISERABLE FREAK WHY CAN'T YOU JUST SHUT UUUPPPPP!!!!!!!

All the cats ran away in fright, while Pip struggled in my grip and tried to bite my thumb. Finally I put her back down on the floor and she lay quietly next to me. Behaving, at last. She didn't even flinch when her arch-enemy Lucie came and lay beside her for a while.


About the only time Pip doesn't start trouble

After a bit I went to the bathroom to wash my hands, Pip followed as usual, and as she jumped up the glass wall of the shower cubicle I walked out of the bathroom.

Then I heard
the SHRIEEEK!!! of a Pip tumbling off the wall and
the BAM!!! of a Pip hitting the toilet bowl and
the CRASHHH!!! of a Pip landing on the detergent bottles on the floor and then

Pip shot out the bathroom at top speed, her lower lip bleeding slightly. Apart from that, no discernible injury. Thank goodness.

Pip was pretty subdued the rest of the day.


Till next time, sucker

CatDonna