CatDonna's Cats

Welcome, welcome back! Glad to see you're looking well. At least one of us is happy.

(The Woman: Pip, you've put on weight. I saw a distinct waddle in your gait when you came to greet us.)


Of course I'm fat!
I mean, what kinda lousy slave did you send me while you were away?
The kind that treats me like one of the cats?!?!?!!!!
Pfffffffttttt!!!!!!!!!!


Ohhh, she was horrible to me, oy!
Thankfully I managed to make life hell for her by hiding under the bathroom sink for an entire week, beating her on a regular basis, eating all her bribes and generally refusing to cooperate.

(The Woman: Yes I know, Sue panicked and made an overseas call about the abusive black-and-white cat that disappeared somewhere in the house, and yet somehow managed to eat all the bribes without being caught.)


Indeed! How I languished in sorrow and suffering!
Enduring her constant mistakes, her "stop hiding you stupid cat", her utter lack of respect for My Highness!!!

(Teddy: Momie Ladie, Boonie and Lucie say to let you know that it was Pip who hid in your bedroom and bathroom all week, made the catsitter almost cry, stole all our treats, and did her toilet all over the shower cubicle and in the laundry basket and ON YOUR PILLOW.)


Oh ha ha ha!!! Oh, that was gooood! What a joker that damn Teddy is!
After this I shall show him how much I appreciate his bloody annoying humour.
Ha ha ha!!! Ha!!! HAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Teddy gets the hint and runs away in fright.)


Anyway, it's time to catch up.
Thank Cod you're back so it's good times again for everyone...

(The Woman: Pip, why do you like to rest on my boobs so much?!)


*purrrrr* Mmmmm... What?