Thursday, February 09, 2006

New Ambi Purr*: Feline Citrus

[*Ambi Pure: local (?) brand of air freshener]

Doe has been vomiting on and off lately, with greater-than-normal frequency. He has a sensitive gut and has always been a bit of a puker, but now it's almost everyday. I'm keeping it under control with Benebac and it's improving, so fingers crossed.

Why am I mentioning this? Because... CUE YET ANOTHER WEIRD AND SLIGHTLY GROSS STORY THAT ONLY CAT LOVERS CAN UNDERSTAND. Yet again. Gaaaaaaaahhh. Teehee.

It was about a week ago. I was rushing off to work and slipped on my fav pair of smart black sandals. Before I put it on I'd noticed some crusty brown bits on the sides, but thought it was cat litter from their paws. Some of the cats like to slip their heads/paws in my footwear and slide around the living room roaring, enthralled in some crazy kitty version of bumper cars.

So I didn't think much of it. Plus it was 7 in the morning and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON, NO SIRREE. It was only when I got out of the car and walked towards the building that I started thinking, Hmm, I don't remember this sticky squelchy feeling.

By the time I reached the office I was beginning to make this sick speeeuuccchh sound everytime my left foot hit the floor. Oh what joy.

I went into the bathroom, took off my sandal and started cleaning out the vomit... and then, with the incredible genius found only in rocket scientists such as myself, decided that maybe if I sniffed the vomit I'd scraped off, I would be able to ascertain the cause[s] of Doe's recent pukejoy.

Deep sniff. Ahh, the sweet aroma. Mmm... I know that one. Cat biscuit... and citrus???

Then it hit me [the eureka moment of discovery, not the aroma]: Doe sometimes scampers out the door for a couple minutes of outdoor scampering-time, and he's very fond of my neighbour's plants [sigh]. I stop him the moment I catch him, of course, and usually he's under close supervision, but he must've got lucky one night. And ate the forbidden fruit of the neighbour's Chinese New Year kumquat tree.

Oh, the triumph of logical deduction. Barefoot in the bathroom, face in sandal, I sniggered in delight. I had Done It. Cracked code. Solved mystery. Rocket scientist.

And then my colleagues walked in.


Wa sai. Your quest for truth made me bow before you with humility and respect. How clever, and very noble of you!

But then the rest of the day, how you work ah?
Ahahaha! You crack me up. Big time! Please post photos of two things, can?

Number 1: Cats playing Bumper Cars with your shoes

Number 2: You barefoot in the loo sniffing at your soiled shoe

~5-Cat Style
cat_aunty: Heehee, actually on hindsight I realised I was being very very gross, so I'm quite embarrassed about it. *shrivels with sudden shyness* I was fine once I washed everything off... just had to smile at my, umm, discreetly staring colleagues. OKAY OKAY they weren't very discreet. Heh heh!!! :D

5CS: Heh heh! Bumper car shots will depend on my luck and speed; you know how fast cats fly about when they play. Can't do number two sorry, I can't imagine the number of hits I might get from image searches for "vomit p0rn", "foot fetish", "toilet girls" etc hahahaha!!! :D

Oh dear... the wonderful possibilities.
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